The bump in the road is turning out to be one of those big rollercoaster type loops. The kind that make your stomach drop then feel like it's way up in your throat & then finally it settles back down to where it's supposed to be but it will be a while before you feel *right* again.
Last night Gord was transferred from The General to PMH - about 15 minutes after we got there, he was feeling dizzy. The nurse tried to get a Blood Pressure reading on him but couldn't - so another nurse was callled....and then another... and another... and another... and medics on call & soon it was a flurry of activity in his room & me standing outside just watching. About 4 doctors and 6+ nurses & the mobile ACCESS team from the Mount Sinai ICU all in there, working to make him better.
All I could do was stand outside, watching. Some angel of a nurse stood beside me the whole time, explaining everything that was going on, telling me it was going to be okay. It took what felt like forever, but they eventually motioned for me to come in & be with him. He was bundled up much like Frankie was when she was new - just his head poking out from a cocoon of flannel blankets.
So what happened? His blood pressure was very, very low. His heart rate was very, very high. He was severely dehydrated, he had virtually no electrolytes and his kidneys weren't functioning properly. They literally dumped 5 bags of saline into him (through his hickman & then through an IV they put in his arm). They didn't even run it through the IV pump - it just poured right into him. They took more vials & bottles of blood from him than I thought he could even fill (really - when they walked out with them all I wondered if he had any blood left in his body) to check for any possible infection.
I called my mom (who is still helping out to the max with Frankie) to give her the update & she said she'd call my dad to come & be with me. Gord's mom, sister & brother in-law also came. Today I realized - you don't know what you need until it's forced on you.
They kept a close watch on him & did more bloodwork to check on his kidney function and finally, they made the decision that he should be moved to the ICU at Mount Sinai - they would continue with the hydration, but if his kidneys did not respond positively to it, then they would go ahead with dialysis. Gord was awake & fairly aware of what was going on - aware enough to comment that he was happy to go there, since their food is pretty good.
We stuck around until we were sure he was fairly stable & comfortable and then it was a slumber party over at my house. I bunked in the nursery with Frankie - not really sleeping... just listening to the tiny sounds she makes as she sleeps & focusing all of my energy on trying to relax & remembering what Gord & I have been sticking to since his relapse in February: Let go, Let God. Whatever is coming is coming regardless - we have to stay close, stay strong, stay ready & stay ever hopeful.
Arlene, Lorraine & I went to visit this afternoon. I walked in on Gord, happily eating his lunch of fresh fruit. "I love fresh fruit. This is beautiful. My eyes lit up as soon as I saw it come in the room." And my eyes lit up watching him eat - it'd been over a week of hardly any eating. Melon to the rescue!
His BP is a tiny bit low, but good - his HR is good, his creatine levels have come down slightly. He is incredibly exhausted but I'd say he's in this game for a while longer yet.